LifeStyle || How to Manage Your Relationship on Social Media.

How to Manage your relationship on social Media-4


A lot of people have asked me on several occasions,

“How do you manage your relationship being so public?”

 

“How do you manage your relationship being on social media?”

The honest truth? I’m not entirely sure, but I did give it a little thought and what I do know is that there are a few conscious steps I take in order to ensure that my relationship with Chi is as private as it can be.


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I actually never imagined my relationship will be one of public interest; but given the circumstances around which the relationship started , Chi and I felt it might be nice to show people that relationships like ours can work. So after much deliberation, loads of conversations and decisions on what and how to go about it, we made our relationship pretty public earlier this year on my blog and it’s associated social media platforms.

We went against all the various advice people give about social media and relationships; but with the number of messages we get and testimonies from other couples, we both agree it was a good move and don’t regret it at all.

That said, there are some limits, controls and checks that we have put in place to ensure that its privacy is still preserved to some extent and that’s what I’m going to share with you real quick!

Here are a few things you can do in order to manage your relationship being on social media.


Separate your moments

I cannot over emphasise this enough. Not everything that goes on in your relationship needs to be put online, even if it’s a happy moment. You don’t need to share the fact that your significant other just got you an amazing gift with the whole world at every single point in time. You don’t need to share the details of every date night you go on. You need to learn to keep somethings to yourself no matter how fantastic or annoying they are – Especially if you’re someone in the public eye like myself.


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The best way to go about this is to stick to popular dates when “love is in the air”. Think Christmas time, New year’s eve, Valentines day, Thanks giving and so on – those are all seasons when almost everyone is talking about their family and the love of their life. So you sharing yours during such a time won’t stand out as showing off.

If you blog or vlog like myself, you could also share snippets of special personal days like birthdays and anniversaries, but even these personal days should have their details kept as private as possible so they still remain special to you.

Know what is acceptable to share

It’s important to know what your partner is okay or not okay with you sharing online. Does your partner want the details of your holiday together shared in a vlog? Do they want people to know about the new car you got? Are they okay with you talking about the fact that things aren’t always perfect?



Believe it or not, every single post that goes out on my instagram, facebook or my blog and has to do with my relationship goes through Chi first; and vice versa. This isn’t always done so the other party can criticise the content that’s about to be put out but it’s always nice to inform your partner about the post or video that’s about to go out. Why? Well, it’s mainly to ensure they aren’t taken unawares, especially if people are likely to make all sorts of comments about the content in question (unless of course it’s a birthday shout out #lol) – It’s just simple courtesy.

Take Everything with a pinch of Salt

Believe it or not, there are many people just waiting around to see if something will go wrong in your relationship or for an opportunity to make a spiteful comment, be a judge, say I told you so or what not; and most times, these people are just sadist.



They do not wish you well in any way, shape or form. So when you see ‘odd’ comments about your relationship on a photo, video or even via instastories, simply delete and move on – Take it with a pinch of salt.

On the other hand, there are some people that do wish you well but sometimes give advice or make comments that do not sit too well with you. Again, take it with a pinch of salt. Even the ‘good comments‘ and the ‘nice ones’ – take them all with a pinch of salt. Never let someone behind a gadget dictate the mood or ‘vibe’ of your relationship by a simple comment.

At the end of the day, most of the people showing love or hate on your social media platforms will only remain social media buddies.


So from Chi and I to you, we hope you do find these tips useful and continue to grow in love with you other whole!


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Demi Signature

 

Lifestyle || The truth about reuniting after a long distance relationship! #RealExperiences

Hey there!

I hope you’re having a nice day. So on Sunday the 17th of June 2018, my boyfriend and I celebrated 4 years of our relationship! whoop whoop. However, the most part of that relationship was spent as a long distance relationship. By most part I mean 3 years #lol.

There are many things we discovered over the last year during what I like to describe as our reuniting period and trust me it’s been one heck of a journey! So to celebrate, we decided to do another video for you guys talking about some of the things no one tells you about reuniting after a long distance relationship. Honestly, once the excitement of finally being together wears off, it turns into something else and it’s almost like you’re learning to be in a relationship all over again (at some point you might wish you were dating long distance again #haha)… but anyways, enough rambling; here’s the video and we hope you learn a thing or two!

Demi xoxo

 

Lifestyle || How to Sustain a long distance relationship – My 5 Top Tips!

I feel as if this is a long overdue post. However, my reluctance to actually sit down and pen down type my thoughts on this subject is probably due to the fact that there are a thousand and one opinions on this topic. Every long distance relationship is unique in it’s own way. That said, I do believe there are a few things that all persons in long distance relationships (or those considering long distance relationships) must do to make things work!

So having dated Chi for 3 years long distance, I think it’s about time to tell you a few things we did to make the relationship work!

#1 – Communicate Constantly

I CANNOT stress this enough. Yes every relationship needs good communication but in a long distance relationship, it is even more important. Why? Well for one, you need a way to stay in touch as you are miles apart from each-other. Two, it makes you involved in the other person’s life as you’ll probably always talk about things you’ve done during the day or are about to do.

Ensure you discuss new decisions you intend on making, seek for your partners opinion and advice on situations. Do not make a life changing decision and inform your partner after it’s done and dusted. Constant communication not only allows you to know the other person is doing okay, but it makes both parties feel involved in the other person’s life.; Greet each-other in the morning and night- it is very very important

 

Chi and I literally were in contact every single day! Although some people think we were a bit excessive, we could tell what the next move of the other person will be which was also great for building trust!

#2 – Keep External Parties External

All outside parties should remain outside. This is not to say that you shouldn’t take advice from people around you but know when to draw the line. Keep the details of your arguments, the good times, special moments to yourselves. Long distance relationships are complex enough for you to include comments and unsolicited opinions from other people into the mix.

Some people wish you well and some don’t. The sad part is you can’t always tell who is who so it’s best to avoid unnecessary chit chat about your relationship.

#3 – Do things together

You’re probably wondering how this is possible but trust me it is! I remember my housemates walking into my room in uni and asking “What are you doing?” and I’d often times reply “Watching a movie with Chi”… We had days when we decided on a movie we both want to watch, we’ll start the movie together over a video or voice call, end the call and make commentaries about it as the movie went along via text – I know, that’s a lot of effort, but it’s the sort of thing that kept our 3 year long distance relationship going.

 


READ – 5 places to Eat and Hangout for 2 under 5k! 

Now I’m not saying you should do the exact same thing but you need to find ways to do things together. Recommend series that both of you can watch separately and talk about later. Recommend music albums to listen to. If you both love to read, recommend books. Take the other person shopping with you via Skype or Whatsapp. Be creative in finding things to do together!

#4 – Remember important dates

… and I’m not talking about Birthdays, Valentine day and so on. Those are given. I’m talking about dates like when exams start (if either party is studying), the date for that job interview, the first day of work, the date for that special program your partner is organising and so on. Not only does it show that you care enough to remember the little things, it also shows that you are interested in every aspect of your partners life.

Wherever possible, celebrate such dates and occasions. Making the little things count will also help build memories.

 


#5 – Be honest

Last but not the least, do not create room for doubt or distrust between you and your partner. It’s the last thing you need in a Long distance relationship and dishonesty will inevitably lead to the death of your relationship.


These tips and a few other things are what kept Chi and I together for 3 years and so from us, we hope they do help another couple out there foster and make their love even more beautiful!

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